here i lie wasted...

have come to a stage where all i feel is anxiety..feel like a complete waste..feel like ..well in on e word helpless...torn between what i wanna do..well ask me all i wanna do is get away from home..from being under the constant expectation of making it big and dunno what all.. i sure dnt wanna join any random good for nothing mba coaching.. n be another one in the long rat race..,,my anxiety doesnt come from thinking about the future but from wanting to control it maybe..i notice that when am bored i think i am tired of my surroindings like home at the moment..but is it that or am i actually tired of thinking..my thoughts that overcome the better of me all the time,,all depressing ones..its me i guess that jus produces all the discontent..all the unhappiness..i have a nagging fear that anagging self prediction hat watever would come my way would be the same old thing..i know i cant expect imminent change and remain judgemental of the present...